Grey Gardens

Really wish this movie would come to India. I cannot wait to watch it. It seems like a classic!

"My mother gave me a completely priceless life."
-- "Little Edie" Beale, 1917-2002

If anyone has access to a soft copy or CD or anything, let me know.

Be still my heart!

Dear Man with his head up his Butt,


I hope that the next time you take your little fighter jet out for a spin, you crash!! Why don't you find some man size pants and stop hiding under a skirt called recession!?!

No Love,
Reshma


On another note, I'm presently lusting these Balmian beauties.. only I can never afford them!! Not yet atleast :P

Diwali

The festival of lights. The city looks gorgeous but sounds like a battleground. If one lived in hole and wasn't aware what day it was, it would be pretty believable that there was a war going on.

On that note, hoping everyone is having a Happy and Safe Diwali!

P.S: Loving all the mithai and hoping to burn some noiseless pretty crackers tomorrow :)

Busting some stress

Christian Louboutin centred by reshmakoshy featuring Christian Louboutin shoes

It all started with those Christian Louboutin shoes. And along came the Valentino satin clutch... and then it was as if I was sleep walking.

I'm feeling so much better now! :D Even if it is virtual :P

Bring food!

My day cant possibly go more horribly wrong. I have been in office for 17 hours now. We left office and half way back, we turned around and came straight back for another(what a surprise!) problem. I'm hungry and I ended up dropping my sandwich on the floor. I'm thirsty and I somehow picked melon juice (thinking it was kiwi) and had to drink it.I hate melons!!
I'm still here.
I HATE the world!

Musings of a Girl amongst Akarus and Munds

Socaially awkward malyalee(SAM) incident
Me: So who all at this table are malyalees? (Trying to be funny and with my my brighest smile.. even though i have slept less than 8 hours in the last 48 hours)
SAM: Avoids full eye contact and points meekly at 2 other folks at the table and himself.
Me: Which part of Kerala are u from?
SAM: (Looks at me like I asked him in Greek.) Myself from Chennai. Parents originally from Kerala and now settled in Chennai.

FULLSTOP. (I wish there was a capital letter for . )
So much for dinner time conversation.

Please take a moment to applaud his grammar. His English teacher will choke with pride!

Crazy Egyptian Incident
Crazy Egyptian is the dude in charge and his only responsibility during this entire duration is to furrow his brows and ask questions that noone responds to. But seriously, the furrowing of the brow!! And as soon as there is a problem, his eyes get all squinty and and his brows start furrowing really deep. So much that I genuinely believe that he has bone structure jutting out of his forehead. Like 2 furrow horns.
So anyway, my teammates and I are walking back from the cafeteria and chatting about something in English.
This dude is walking right behind, catches up with us and says, "One day I'm gonna get all my Egyptian friends and start talking to them in Arabic and then we'll see how you feel".
Reaction from the 3 of us: Blink. Blink. Blink. Walk away puzzled.
We were talking in English!

Oh Oh.. and I should mention the part about the handshaking. I want you to do this for you to understand. Go to your kitchen and shake hands with a slice of bread! That's how weird it was!

Polite American incident
This is not so much an incident as it is an experience. Always smiles and stops to say hello, passes the water, makes easy chatter, and does not treat me differently just because I'm the only girl in a team of .. oh.. I dunno.. a 100 men!! But then again, its not surprising considering most Americans are like that.

A country full of silly Malyalees and bizarre arabs!

Tadaaaaaaa!!!!!

For those who want to snorkel in style :D
Hilarious!!

The 4 food groups.. err.. (I cant say it!!)

Category 1
Has the perfect person in their life and lives the fabulous life but does not know the meaning of commitment. When crunch time comes, they fail to feel the rush they ought to feel or atleast a little fear if said person were to leave them. And so they are, for lack of a better phrase, walking a tight rope.

Category 2
Has the word "commitment" pinned down in a boxer's grip and will die but not let go. But the person they should really be pinning down, is busy looking at a butterfly fluttering in the wind. One way street. Yellow signal. Should they speed up and drive right past or slow down?

Category 3
Who? what? where? marriage? Gasp! Cross.. Garlic! HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Category 4
Found each other. Everything worked out. Rainbows. Unicorns. Glitter. Sunshine. Our parents and all the other happy couples in the world.

I'm category 3 right now and the whole situation just makes me want to run to the Himalayas and live like a hermit.

P.S: This may be an awkward post. I may have brought up a taboo subject. I may as well have talked about the colon and its functions (to point out how I'm so not ready for it and how I will speak of anything but.. err.. the four food groups!) or described the blairwitch project (to emphasize how scary the whole situation is).

P.P.S: Everyone wishes they were Category 4. So all those who are. You hit jackpot! :D I envy you as only a Category 3 can!

P.P.P.S: Rumzzz... babe.. You deserve a special congratulations! And im so bummed about not making it for your engagement.
Also, you have made an "appearance" on a blog that has exactly 6 followers :D UR FAMOUS!

Retarded Imbeciles

Apparently my personal life is of great interest to some people here at my work place. Face-less couldn't-care-less-what-the-hell-their-names-are people. May I interject that the people in question here are juniors.. Fresh off the canteen college grads.

I know that it is difficult to transition into a professional mould as soon as one graduates. But that does not mean it's ok to be plain retarded. So much so that one's credibility as a valuable resource is jeopardized. And I have seen that happening to a couple of freshers in my team. Talented people brushed aside as useless only because they cant keep their trap shut! Honestly, if I were setting up a team, I wouldn't want them in my team either. Especially since I'm aware that one of their many(useless) subjects of conversation, involves my personal life.

I'm amazed where they get their information from. Or what they were smoking when they reiterate it to someone else. Because the next person has a totally different version of the original (but still false) story.

When I was a fresh faced college grad at my first ever job, I was petrified. Shitting bricks in my pants each time I didn't have an answer for a question. Some of these kids are plain cocky and stupid.

The Silver Lining

Yesterday, I celebrated my 26th birthday. What I thought would be a devastating day for me, turned out to be a brilliant day filled with loads of wishes and love from family and friends, even estranged friends. And I couldnt have asked for the day to unfold more brilliantly.

The previous day, I received a large bouquet of colourful flowers from a friend who's not in town. What a surprise! And a day early! But I wasn't complaining. Nothing like flowers to make you feel all happy and cheerful! Hey Gautam ;)

Pre-birthday flutter. Check.

At midnight, my 2 beautiful flatmates jump started my birthday with a nice little birthday cake (lit up) and a party hat for me. Somewhere between "Happy Birthday to you" and "May God bless you", they realised that the whole thing was too civilised for their comfort. And before I knew it, I was wearing a chocolate cream facepack.

Beauty Regimen face pack. Check.

When I woke up in the morning, I was greeted with a giant cake, flowers and .. believe it or not.. a musical card from my Dad. How cute is that? Trust dads to come up with something that unbelievably cute and tacky.. just to give you the giggles! And if that wasnt a perfect enough, a friend of mine dropped in to wish me and say Hi before I embarked on the monumentous task of "dealing with being 26". Hi Su! :D

Feel good. Check.

As the day wore on, so did my cellphone battery. I was swamped with phone calls all day. And Boy! It felt good to talk to people, ones I hadn't spoken to in ages.

Get back in the loop. Check.

In the evening, after receiving strict instructions to dress up (Or like Barney says, Suit Up!), I got dressed and was taken to The Tapas Lounge in Caperberry. It was a brilliant idea because the place was very nice. I'm just going to let the photos do all the talking now :)



And the location scout courtesy Mads :)


The awesome cake.. All thanks to Rashmi and Swe


Since I am in love with all things numbered, bulleted, post-it(ed) and in general, oragnized, I loved the post-it card they gave me


And since we are on the subject of shoes, here are some fabulous statement shoes


Edit: I recently discovered the efforts Ramya and Su made to ensure that I got my birthday gift on the 27th itself and not later. There was a lot of last minute running around for it. And I'm so thankful that they made the effort :)



Have a badass B'day. Check!

Thanks to my family and friends who delightfully surprised me with their love and care when I least expect it. I wont last a day without all of them!

Get away car

Another song that I have been listening to nonstop. And I cant help feeling she couldnt be more right.

K T Tunstall - Saving My Face

There's only so much chocolate you can eat before you get sick of it, wear your favourite heels until they lose its sheen, watch a movie until it bores you, listen to a track till the notes annoy you. There is only so much you can tolerate of the same thing over and over again.

And one day, the things you were procrastinating because you were having too much fun, take a higher precedence in your list of priorities. Sheer urge to escape being the only motivation.

I hope I have enough thrust to make it to my get away car.

What If?

I found this hilarious song about marriage. Sandi Thom. What if I'm right

That's all I have to say on the subject :)

P.S:
"You won't forsake me, your mother won't hate me
But I got my doubts & what if I'm right" ...LOL

No Aliens.. No Meteors.. No Species

Over lunch, a colleague was describing a movie where a bunch of scientists as an experiment for the government create some sort of contraption that drills down to the core of the earth, lodges itself over there and stops the earth's rotation. And what started out as an experiment (metaphorically reminiscent of a little boy I once knew who set his own pants on fire!) turns ugly and now earth and its beings are faced with extinction. Obviously some hero/scientist/stubbly hot dude with soda-bottle glasses jumps in and saves the day in true Hollywood style.

It sounds like a stupid movie and so over done in that "Deep Impact" or "Independence day" sort of way. I don't know why I'm even writing this. I dont even know its name. Maybe there's a part of me really wishing the earth would stop rotating right now.

What a blast it has been

Today, 4 years ago, I first came to this city that I now consider my home away from home. On 20th June 2005, as I saw my Mom's rick turn around the corner as she headed back to the station to get back to Chennai, I remember thinking "Oh My God! What have I gotten myself into?" as the cold air made my tear glands react a little. I went for my first day at my new job after that.

Oh yes people! I vividly remember. It was cold on 19th June 2005. Its hot on 19th June 2009. Global warming! or as I like to call it.. "Closer to Armageddon".

During the earlier years, I have had days when I regretted ever coming here. But today, I feel like I made the best of it.

Have I made some mistakes? yes.
Have I made bad choices? yes.
Could my life have been better had I never come here? No. I can't imagine how.

I have had an absolute blast being here. This city has taught me how to be more free-spirited and bend a few rules. I have made some very unexpected friends who have been around since Day 1. And some who aren't around anymore. But their presence in my life made those days so precious. It has taught me how to be more tolerant and forgiving. It made me realise who I was. I mingled in circles varying from (for lack of a better expression) Crème brûlée to Jello. And I realised, that I am a Jello kind of girl who indulges in Crème brûlée once in a while. (Which Cameron Diaz/Julia Roberts movie am I thinking about?)

Expectations. The less you expect, the more you find yourself pleased with what you get. (Disclaimer: This does not apply to green pieces of paper with Gandhi's face on it. Milk the conglomerates. I'm busting my ass anyways :P).


Loving your friends. They are the support system that have kept me breathing. Without their help, I would have been a very lost and lonely person and would have given up a long time ago. They know every expression I have and even if I blink differently, they'll know something's up.


Loving yourself. No one will take care of you as well as your parents. And if there is another person, it is yourself.


Independence. I have to say, I'm getting very used to the whole no-questions-asked way of my life. And I might have a problem when the time comes for the bigger commitments of my life. But for now, I can't ask for more.


Strengthened bonds with family. Believe it or not, I feel closer to my family now than ever before. They stood silently by my side for every whim I had. And never have they objected.


Tougher. It will probably take a lot to faze me. I know that I can survive anywhere. We all have survived weakened wills, heartbreak and breaches of trust. But like everyone else, we picked up the pieces and moved on. I know that I have wronged some people in the process of making my choices. It was hard. But it had to be done.

It was an awesome ride so far. I hope we continue being fun and lively(I know.. its lost its sheen a little). I hope I get to do something fun to celebrate tomorrow with the ones who are with me since 20 June 2005.

Quarter Life Crisis

by unknown

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

Many may have already read this. I found this piece while I was doing some random reading and I cannot agree more with this unknown person. Most people might feel like they relate to this when they read it. I know I did! I didn't want to make this post very introspective. But like lots of people my age, I'm in crisis mode. And am willing to look everywhere to find some direction.

2

Two basic things that define our generation:

1. Jeans



2. Maggi Noodles



Source: After a deep(ok!!so maybe not that deep!) and lengthy discussion over coffee with colleagues.

Oh.. the horror

Its dirty and has very scary looking teeth.



I'm not a big fan of dogs. Mainly because I am scared of them more than I am of.. oh, I don't know.. an axe murderer?!?. Until a while ago, it used to border on phobia. Then I started learning how to ignore them and they ignored me too. I would be indifferent if they minded their own business and stayed away from me. I even found the little ones cute (from a distance).

Today morning, I was standing in my usual spot waiting for my ride to work. I thought I was safely standing a good 50 ft away from a usual pack of stray dogs that hang out in that area. They were sleepy and scratchy. Then suddenly, as if they sniffed something in the air, all of them got up and charged at the traffic. Only to realise later that it was nothing and that they should go back to sleep.

But just like most things in my life that tend to go wrong, one dog caught sight of me and came charging and barking at me. Now, you know how people say that you shouldn't panic when a dog barks at you?. Well, I panicked. I panicked and screamed in a voice that closely resembled an opera singer's. I think that irritated the dog more. And it came closer to me and I started backing up into the traffic in my state pf shock/fear/"somebody shoot this dog" panic. To put it mildly, a car almost hit me. The poor driver didn't even know how to scream at me for being so stupid seeing I was already all shook up thanks to the dog who still didn't SHUT UP! So he turned his car towards the dog to shoo it away, stayed with me till my ride came. Bless that man.

But now, I HATE dogs. And I don't want rabies. Right now, I'm picturing myself with a hunting gun shooting the crap out of that stupid pack of dogs. And I know that some animal rights activist might give me a hard time that I even said something like that. Maybe later, I'll not want them dead, just abducted by aliens or whisked away by the Pied Piper. But never will I want them chasing after me. That's just horror movie material.

The little things that make you happy

Perk Poppers and Appy Fizz. I finished 2 bags of Perk Poppers during lunch.
And those round little chocolate yummies are one of my all time favourites.

Remember Cadbury's Nutties? Back from 1990s? Came in a little red box? It tastes exactly the same. I'm so glad Cadbury's relaunched it.


Best idea ever. Retro never goes out of style ..err..taste:D

Made me forget what a horrible day I was having. At one point, I wanted to throw the whole computer on the floor and stomp the living daylights out of that stupid box. Instead, I went to Big Bazaar and came back armed with 2 bags of Poppers and a bottle of Appy Fizz, grinning ear to ear.

Oh happy days!

For the first time

...in a very long time. I'm very very excited. No. I don't think I emphasized enough how EXCITED I am. I am VERY VERY excited. :P
After having spent more then 3 years as a paying guest in a 3 bedroom flat where everything is taken care of, I got tired of it. The place was very homely and clean and well kept. It was like living in a serviced apartment. The reason I stayed there was because it reminded me of my home back in Chennai. But I got tired of the rules and not being able to have friends over and the constant visit to the damned laundry service and most importantly.. the food. I got very tired of the food. And then the clock struck 12 at midnight and the carriage turned into a pumpkin and everything got shot to hell.

So then I said.. screw the damned pumpkin carriage and decided to get myself a carriage made of Titanium .aka. my own flat. The Fairy Godmother can sit on it!

This is where time stopped being linear altogether. I was looking at houses for only 4 days. But it seemed like I had been at it forever. And after (4)days of looking at houses that resembled slightly improved slums and fretting and crying and (possibly) driving my friends mad, I found a place that suited all my requirements.

Main road, respectable apartment building, 24 hr security, big furnished room with my OWN bathroom, all other house hold processes already in place and bang opposite my old office building. Other things that are nice about the place are the swimming pool, the lawn outside my new flat and (I'm told) a little gym.

All of the things I have said before are not the reasons for my extreme excitement.

For a while now, I have wanted to try my hand at designing a living space. Now that I have my own place, I can finally design and accessorize my room the way I please. Free hand. No questions. And that is making me a little giddy with excitement. I cant stop looking for new design ideas online and can't wait to hit the home stores. I can almost see the curtains and the the rugs in my mind.

Ok. Now I'm going to stop drooling all over this web page. And once again, peace and order is restored in a land called Chaotic-resh-land.

P.S: For all those who haven't figured out if God exists, take it from me. There is God. All you have to do to find Him is cry for 4 days straight :D And don't worry. Its not because God is cruel. Its because I believe that my tears evaporated and went into the water cycle only to become rain for somewhere else. So over all, we all win.

P.P.S: :D

I will take it personally

I am sick and tired of all the "Bangaloreans" whining about the culture degradation and population and pollution and bla bla bla.. For Christ's sake, will you can it already and find it in your brain (no matter how remote) to channel some rationalism?

My entire life, I have never stayed in one place. My father was in the Army and I moved a lot. A LOT! I never had a real home. I made home wherever I was. I never had a problem adjusting to the people and picking up languages. I never felt out of place. I always felt at home. Because everywhere I went, it was my COUNTRY. And no North Indian was biased against me because I was a South Indian (or what they like to call "Madrasis"). That never got in my way because I always found a way to prove I was good (I don't mean to sound pompous. But you have to understand the pressure of constant change and coping and getting people to accept you).

But you know where I have felt the most out of place? In my own part of the country. South India. Bangalore.

When I moved to Bangalore, I always thought of this place where no one will feel out of place. Because there are all kinds of people here. It was thought of as a veritable melting-pot; of cultures, languages and people (Indians and expatriates). It symbolised all the true shades of secularism, not just its literal religious implications.

I know 4 year isn't a very long time to say much about a place. But I do know when an attitude starts to stink. It takes no time to realize that!

When people cried "culture degradation", I admit that most educated people realised it was all a political gimmick. But can someone "cultured" tell me which part of our culture professes beating up women? In my opinion, all the inflow of culture and ideas has only made the stand of the WOMAN in the India, stronger. Uneducated minions of political buffoons (like Muthalik), the whole lot have the IQ of a fly. They can never begin to understand what a powerful woman is. They never got slapped hard enough by their mommies when they were little. Let me point out that retaliation for the whole episode was started by a NON-Bangalorean. Nisha Susan, a journalist form New Delhi.

Then people cried "population". So can someone please tell me who opened the gates of Bangalore to let in the Conglomerates and MNCs? Im sorry, I don't have the intelligence to match the great economically driven Governments. Oh wait a sec!! I do have a little intelligence. So the answer is - The Government. When they wanted people to work for the BIG companies, who gave them the OK to bring people in? The Government. When the State was rolling in money and middle class ruled, who clapped their hands? The Government and WE ALL DID. But when the city couldnt take its explosion anymore, what did the geniuses in The Government do? They sent hooligans to beat up anyone who didn't speak Kannada and stood outside a club (which by the way, they gave the permit to run). And made the outsiders look like the culprits. I heard this somewhere and i think it holds true here - "The Devil's biggest trick was to convince the world he didn't exist". BUT HE DOES. And he is in all those who point fingers at others for mistakes they didn't anticipate.

Then the people cried "language". Kannada. I have a lot of respect for all who speak the language. And as I said earlier, I have always been in places where I did have to learn the language of the state. I have done it before. I'm doing it now. But when will the people learn to respect their country's national language. Hindi. I accuse all states who haven't made the effort to learn it. And all people who condemn it. I am an Indian before I am a Tamilian or Kannadiga or Malayalee or Bihari or whatever. And I wish people would realise that. I am scared to speak in Hindi to an autowala for fear of which one will turn back and start lecturing me on how outsiders have ruined their city.

Then the people cried "pollution". Which city in the world isn't battling pollution? But its the choices we make that makes the difference. We live in a big BIG city. And getting around is hard. No one wants to take public transport because of its sorry state. Everyone has a bike or a car. But our choices affects the environment. My friends made fun of me when I spoke of buying the Tata Nano. Its a brilliant car, efficient design and effective in terms of mileage and exhaust. But everyone wants the Big car with the muscle and close to nothing mileage.

If I didn't have the job I have now(Thanks to the MNCs) and sat at home all day, I would never have come to Bangalore to degrade their culture and add to their population and made money (for me and them). If I don't have the money, I wouldn't plan on buying the big car which added to the pollution. So there you go! The answer to all your problems is... a screeching Economic halt. (Drum rolls please! We have a eureka moment here! )

But wait a sec, people still want the money! What a pickle! (Stop the Drum rolls!)

This city is a tiny little speck in a huge country called India. And I support whatever steps we must take to make this city better. But if someone points a finger and says "Outsiders are the problem", then that's no lesser than any other form of racial terrorism. I'm an part of the problem just as much as the next guy. My life is just as difficult. But I do not agree with this whole new way of breaking the whole country up into little pieces in the name of culture, language, and whatever other criteria they can come up with. This is my way of speaking up. I have put it out there on the internet as a record.

I will not kiss Bangalore's butt JUST because im not from here. I will call a spade, a spade! I am presently a part of this city and cannot contribute to the solution for the city if people like me are treated as part of the problem (Added after comment from "Bangalore Resident" who clearly missed my point)


This little excerpt from the book "A Thing Beyond Forever" by Novoneel Chakraborty will probably sum up the "Outsider" perspective better than anything I have said before:

A conversation between an MBA and a 'struggling actor'. The MBA advises the struggler to first get a job and this is what the actor replies:
"Have you ever seen a star studded sky?

Why, yes.

You may like the star just above your head or the one in the right or to the left perhaps but you got no right to question why the star to the left is in the left.

I believe the point of our living is to find the coordinates where we know we belong and respect it irrespective of whatever difficulties or humiliation we encounter."

P.S: If you are reading this sentence, Thanks for sticking around and listening! :)